Since the unfortunate elevator incident with Janay Rice, domestic Violence has been put on the forefront in the media. People are talking in all arenas and because of that, women are stepping up and reaching out for help. The Abuse Hotline has risen over 80% in calls. That is Awesome! Today I am recognizing all survivors from across the globe with this Virtual Certificate of Recognition. I am proud of you for making the heroic choice to break the cycle of abuse in your life and for choosing to say NO MORE! “I deserve to be treated with Dignity and Respect!” Some may not ever understand what it was like to be in your shoes and that’s okay because there are millions that do. I am a survivor and I know what it was like. I know how much courage it took to leave. I know what it was like to have others judge you and criticize you, to belittle your situation and some even blamed you. But you did it girl and I am proud of you! This Certificate is for you! You’ve earned it! And this Recognition is also for the women who didn’t make it out alive or has been incarcerated for defending themselves. My heart goes out to their families. There are others who have just left their abusers and are in the beginning stages. We must encourage them for we know how scary it was to leave and face new beginnings. We can encourage them with our voice and with our stories. Just a brief story in the comment section of who you are and how long you’ve been a survivor and how much your life has changed will inspire others and give them the strength and courage they need. It will let them know that they are not alone. You don’t have to use your real name. I will Start.
My name is Rochelle and I am a DV survivor. I was the mother of twin girls that at the time were two years old.My Ex husband was in the Navy and I was a dependent. I lived in an abusive marriage for about three years. When I left I was an emotional mess. But I survived. I went back twice. I was guilty for years thinking that I was hurting the kids by taking them away from their father. But it was truly for the best. I wrote my story ” A Black Rose Thrived”. I will continue to tell my story and encourage other women to Rise and Shine. DV is not a private family matter it is a Crime!
(Comment from Mandy)
I was 13 and he was 17 when we started dating. I never recognized any of the warning signs. I was so young, I had no idea what was and was not acceptable in a relationship and I never talked to my parents about anything. After have three kids together, the emotional abuse started which soon escalated to physical abuse. By this time I was 20. Most of the bruises, burns and other marks were easy to hide. The first set of black eyes was almost impossible to hide but I had to play his game and cake on the concealer and wear hats pulled down low to try to keep others from seeing my injuries. The next beating almost claimed my life. It happened over the course of 12 hours or so- I don’t remember most of it so I’m not exactly sure how long it lasted. I was beaten head-to-toe with anything and everything he could get his hands on- flashlight, fists. He even used a knife to cut my clothes off to try to humiliate me. I can’t remember, or try not to anyways, how it all played out and how it all came to an end. I’ve never prayed harder in my life than I did that night. By the grace of God, I survived. It’s been almost 14 years ago since I broke free from the abuse. I am married to a wonderful man who’s mother and siblings and himself also suffered the effects of domestic abuse by his biological father. My husband is my biggest fan and supporter in my battle against Domestic Abuse. My abuser went on to date another woman and had two sons with her. Two years ago, he beat her to death and he is now serving 47 years in prison for her murder. I thank God and all those that stood by me and helped me through the worst time of my life. I know that without all of them, I wouldn’t be here today.
(Comment from Jessica)
My name is Jessica and I am a DV survivor. I was an abusive relationship for 11 years . I’ve been out for almost 6. I am still triggered often by a variety of situations. Getting out of that relationship was absolutely the hardest thing I ever did. He promised me he would kill me & I believed him. The first time I left it was to make a statement, I didn’t want to be treated that way anymore. The second time I left, I wasn’t prepared & slept on my fathers floor. I had no money, no plan, I got tired of the struggle after 2 weeks & went back home especially after he held me hostage after I dropped my daughter off at preschool for two hours he beg & pleaded & I got tired I just wanted to go to work & keep my job. The third time I left I had planned for two years carefully. I saw an car add at the bus stop that said everyone has the right to be safe. All I wanted was my safety & freedom and I will willing to give EVERYTHING up i had to and I did. By the grace of god and my own strength I got out. I realize I am one of the lucky ones. Then the hard part of rebuilding my life began. To unlearn everything I knew about relationships and start my life was extremely difficult, I was scared to leave the house for two years because I swore he would get me. The anxiety started the triggers started. But….I learned to walk out the door, I learned to control my triggers (somewhat), I learned that I could have my freedom and safety and I could laugh and be happy and answer to no one. I learned that it wasn’t me who broke up the family, it was him that forced me to have to leave. I wanted the family I wanted the dream, but control was more important to him and that’s his deal. You know it all worked out. I have a almost 12 year old daughter and we volunteer at a few DV non-profits and my girl learning….jealously is not love it is control. I send good energy to all those still not able to make the move, I know, it’s difficult, but I promise you, there are strangers out that care about you and your children. There are people who can and will help you. and I really hope you get the happiness, freedom and safety you deserve.
(Response from the blogger: Rochelle)
Mandy, thank you for coming forth and sharing your heartfelt story. What a conqueror. Your testimony will save many lives. I am so proud of the women that are coming forward and telling the world how you conquered abuse. This is so needed. You and Jessica have started the comments on my page and I am so grateful. The fact that you are remarried again to a loving Man gives women of DV hope. Hope in knowing that Love really doesn’t hurt and that God will always give you double for your trouble. I recognize and acknowledge you ladies today!
AWESOME TESTIMONIES! YOU BOTH HAVE EXTENDED LOVE AND HAVE TOUCHED SOMEONE IN THE WORLD TODAY! THESE FLOWERS ARE FOR YOU.